Service
October 12th, 2009 | 
Author: my joy when with Her is boundless
when not i live my memories
too seldom am i with Her
too often must i dream
i serve Her to the best of my abilities and as often as i can. And She always tells me She can ask no more and i know that is true. But even still, i feel that i fall short as i am not available to Her as often as She might need, nor nearly as often as i’d like. She tells me i am valued, and i believe Her. She says i am an important part of Her House and Her life, and i trust that it is so. And yet… and yet, i want to do more, i want to be better, i want to be a complete slave to Her and i know that i am not and likely never will be. i reflect on these things when i am not with Her… i can’t seem to help it, even though i know She would disapprove.
© 2009 – 2010, boy. All rights reserved.
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Hi Owned Boy,
i feel both You and Sled do not always appreciate all You have and all You share with Her. i am a lowly nothing, but i have never been happier in my life. Everything is wonderment to me, and Lady is so wonderful. i envy both of You.
i also feel now is the time to look up not down. Lady has been trying to tell me to live for the moment, not what may or may not be. Sport drove that lesson into me hard this weekend. i could not provide any support to any of You. i hurt to.
If Lady says You are important than You are. i know You are Owned Boy. We all need to laugh and enjoy and appreciate what W/we have. Lady taught me that i am to hard on myself, and i know i am as guilty as You and Sled of that. i have been kicking myself hard for three days now. Lady does not need it…i do not need it.
i am not nothing…i am joseph who breaks toys and has an attitude.
All of You…Lady, Sled, Owned Boy have worn me out. i have never given of mmyself…EVER. These last few days i realize all i have to give is inside. It is all i have.
Remember Sport gave of himself. He was happy always when i saw.
Laugh all of You please for Lady….for Sport who was all about living.
i can’t write anymore; i am exhausted.
Please Laugh and serve Lady…that is what life is about…”Be Happy All”
leo,
you are such a large part of Ma’ams life as well as the House as a whole. You bring such a wonderfully positive engery to Her and the House W/we would both be lost without you! i know i don’t say enough, but i do think of you as my slave brother and it saddens me when you beat yourself up.
edward