Owned Boy

Archive for the ‘Writing’ Category

This entry contains suppositions and possible assumptions that may or may not be accurate.  They are, however, a reflection of my perceptions and therefore valid as points of discussion and/or contemplation.

There seem to be more anniversaries in a BDSM relationship than in a vanilla one.  Most in a vanilla relationship celebrate their wedding days, but that’s about it.  But what about BDSM relationships?  The dates that seem significant to one partner may not be as significant to the other.  In my relationship with LadyH, there are two significant dates, so far.  The date i became Her submissive, and the date i became Her slave.  If or when a collar is ever offered there will be a third, but of the two now present, each means something different to each of U/us.  For LadyH, the date of surrender as a submissive seems more important, and for me, the date She took ownership of me as Her slave seems more important.  Examining the relationship and O/our roles within it provides clues as to why this might be so.  Read the rest of this entry »

As an s-type, what does the phrase “may i speak freely?” mean to you?  i can tell you what it does not mean.  It does not mean that one can speak from anger, or, more commonly, frustration or that one can show disrespect in one’s attitude or demeanor.  Speaking freely means that one can discuss (stress DISCUSS) any subject.  If there is a subject that is bothering you so much that you cannot contain your frustration when trying to speak of it, then now is not the time to speak of it.  Wait until you’ve had a chance to recognize that your frustration is not going to help resolve matters, but rather will hinder that resolution.  This is a dual-edged sword.  Refraining from speaking of the issue can quickly add to the frustration, but letting the frustration get the better of the conversation is not only self-defeating, it is destructive.  A relationship that has taken months or years to build up and solidify can be severely damaged by the outbreaks which can result from expressing frustration.

To avoid this, sit by yourself and calmly, without emotion, examine the issue(s) which have led you to this point.  After you have done so, then ask if you may speak freely.  You may even want to preface your comments by telling your D-type that the issue you want to discuss has been frustrating you and in that way, give Him or Her a heads-up that this issue is important enough to you to cause that sort of reaction.  You may even want to ask your D-type to develop some sort of hand signal to use so that, without interrupting you, He or She can signal you to calm yourself a bit before continuing.
We all have times when our emotions and frustrations get the better of us.  This is an issue i’ve had difficulty with and i am determined to remove that difficulty from my service. Learning how to deal with it before involving my Owner will make me a better s-type and improve my service to Her.

Those who have read some of these pages know that i prefer to write from a humorous point of view.  i think this posting is going to be of a more serious nature, as the last of LadyHotchKiss’s play sessions with me was of a more serious nature. W/we got back to some basics, which caused me to consider whether what we do is truly play or not. Read the rest of this entry »

Lady HotchKiss gave me the task of doing research on the dangers of ball torture, to include ball rupture.  Following is an article by Lady Jasmine that i found to be the most comprehensive treatment on the subject: Read the rest of this entry »

i have been feeling out-of-sorts lately, and have endeavored to discover the reason(s) why.  i think i finally know.  Read the rest of this entry »

There has been of late, an awful lot of discourse in and around the House concerning the Leather community, it’s traditions, earning leather, etc. Although i am not, and never have been (but may be becoming) interested in being a leatherman, i have long espoused, and lived,  the core beliefs of the Leather community, i.e. honor, integrity, honesty, respect and loyalty.  i am, however, faced now with an ethical dilemma.  Read the rest of this entry »

i had always thought that Domination and submission was some  kind of a linear progression with  slave  on one end of the scale and total Dom on the other, and most people falling somewhere in between.  The longer i’m in the life the more i realize how wrong i’ve been. Read the rest of this entry »